Tender Loving Care

There is a saying by LaShaun Middlebrooks Collier that says, "Self-care is possessing enough self-awareness to invoke repeated patterns of being, that harmoniously correct the behaviours of over-functioning for others while under-functioning for yourself.” 

We all do it. We give so much to others that we haven't anything left to give to ourselves. We put other's needs before our own, while starving ourselves of some much needed attention and care. 

This was an experience of mine last week where I had been available for everyone else but myself, which resulted in a melt-down. Feeling robbed of energy and not following through with some self-love, I became unable to function properly. There were things I had to do that seemed like a ton of effort; fortunately, I was able to push through because it had to be done. 

How many times have you given so much of yourself, in any relationship, and were not taking care of you because you felt your needs were secondary? I'm sure there are too many to count. 

We can also get stuck in the old "If I love this person a ton, they will eventually love me just as much." And then we set about the task of giving ourselves to that other person by either doing everything for them, or by loving them more than we love ourselves.

While it's true giving of ourselves is noble, there's a point where we have to remember to give to ourselves as well. It's a balancing act, but an important one. As demonstrated in my own melt-down, I wasn't giving myself the time and care I needed, and, therefore, was unable to give of myself to others.

How can you care for yourself?
First, realize that giving to yourself is important and not selfish.
Second, carve out time for yourself. If you have children, animals, or elderly parents to care for, then, yes, they need attention. That is a given. But, make sure you are finding the time for you to do what is important for your heart, your soul, and your mind. Only you know what that thing is and only you know the amount of time you can spend.
Third, make the commitment and stick to it. You are important. Your needs are important. What makes your heart sing is also important. But, one of the most important things of all is knowing who you are, and loving yourself fully.

Namaste, beautiful souls!